The Donor Who Dared To Say Don't

You wouldn't sell or give away your kids, would you? So don't donate your sperm!

Friday, July 20, 2007

 

A father by any other name is still a father....

The story as it was published in the Herald Sun (Melbourne, Australia) expanded on the judgement further:

"...to out of three judges ruled the toddler should stay in Ireland close to his father. They said a year was a long time in the life of a developing infant to be away from his dad."

Sperm donor wins court fight to keep lesbian couple's infant in Ireland
Thursday, July 19, 2007
By SHAWN POGATCHNIK
Associated Press Writer

DUBLIN, Ireland (AP) A man who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple won a legal fight Thursday to keep his biological son in Ireland.

The Supreme Court judgment was a first in Ireland, a predominantly Roman Catholic country where the rights of same-sex couples and sperm donors have not been spelled out. Now the couple, wed in a civil union ceremony in England, cannot spend long periods in Australia with their 14-month-old boy as planned, but can only vacation there for up to six weeks.

Another courtroom battle between the man and the couple looms over joint custody of the boy.

Two judges, Justices Susan Denham and Joseph Finnegan, ruled that the toddler's best interests required him to stay in Ireland near his biological father. The third judge, Justice Nial Fennelly, disagreed, arguing no evidence was offered that the boy would be harmed by leaving Ireland.

``The case is utterly unique and unprecedented,'' Fennelly wrote in his dissent, noting that neither the parental rights of sperm donors nor lesbian couples are defined in Irish law.

Neither side has been publicly identified, following Ireland's policy of granting anonymity to family law litigants.

The lesbian couple an Irish woman and an Australian exchanged vows in January 2006, just after same-sex civil unions were legalized in the United Kingdom. The Irish woman was pregnant by the Irish sperm donor, who signed a contract giving him visitation rights.

The boy, born in May 2006, has his biological father's name as his middle name, and the lesbian couple initially granted the man regular visits. But tensions quickly grew, both sides' lawyers agreed.

The couple restricted the man's access to the boy, then announced they planned to go to Australia for up to a year. The man filed two lawsuits one to restrict the trip and another seeking joint custody. The custody case is to be heard this fall.

Thursday's verdict upheld a judgment by High Court Justice Henry Abbott, who ruled the lesbian couple could take the boy to Australia for six weeks. The Supreme Court held that until the custody claim is considered, the boy should travel outside Ireland for only a limited period.


(Copyright 2007 The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

Monday, July 02, 2007

 

Dispensable dad they all said

They needed a donor and chose a friend who would have little role in their son's life.

"Sam does not have a father; he has someone who helped bring him into the world," Annan said. "After Sam was born, he (the donor) stopped by the hospital, held him for a minute or two, said he was proud of us and then left us. He has his own family. He is happy with what he has got."


These few words manage to encapsulate the mindset (hopes and wishes) of all who use donor gametes to produce a child for themselves.

Not only did these two women purposefully choose someone who they knew would have little role in their son's life they then go on to override their son's right to even have a father.

How do they propose referring to his father in years to come? Clearly at this point in time they would rather he were no more than a 'midwife' (aren't they the people who help bring babies into the world?)

How readily they dismiss the father's feelings.
And besides, how would they know how he really feels?

I would wager that the statement, "He is happy with what he has got", says more about the apprehensiveness of the mother and her partner that this seemingly blithe unconcernedness of their son's father may well not stand the test of time.

The man is a fool and they are just plain selfish.

 

We got what we wanted and you can go now....


Alyson Annan (centre) and Carole Thate with six-week-old Sam on the couch in their living room.

Alyson Annan (centre) and Carole Thate with six-week-old Sam on the couch in their living room.


A son crowns union of Hockeyroo champ and former Dutch captain, as Liz Hannan reports.

First they played against each other, then they fell in love. Now two of the world's greatest women hockey players have had a baby together.

That's the story of Australian Olympian Alyson Annan and her partner, former Olympic rival Carole Thate.

Annan is widely regarded as the greatest female hockey player of all time, but the latest chapter of her remarkable career is giving birth to a baby son, an event that seals her relationship with the former Dutch captain.

Sam Henk Brian Thate was born six weeks ago in the Netherlands, where the retired hockey greats have lived since a friendship, built at the 2000 Games, led to their marriage.

Annan conceived the baby using the donated sperm of a friend.

"One of the great gifts of life is being able to have a baby, but a greater gift is having someone help you," she said. "We have been blessed twice."

Annan played 228 internationals for Australia, while Thate played 168 for the Dutch, leading the side for four years. Annan won gold at two Olympics, Atlanta (1996) and Sydney, consigning Thate and the Dutch to bronze each time.

On the night the Hockeyroos celebrated gold in Sydney, Annan and her husband of two years, former Argentine player Max Caldas, separated after an unhappy year.

Months later, Annan's friendship with Thate blossomed into love after she moved to the Netherlands to play hockey. In September 2005, the couple were married, sharing a common hope: that they would have a family.

"I had wanted to have a baby for a long time. But having a family is different for us; we had to plan it," Annan said from her Amstelveen home.

They needed a donor and chose a friend who would have little role in their son's life.

"Sam does not have a father; he has someone who helped bring him into the world," Annan said. "After Sam was born, he (the donor) stopped by the hospital, held him for a minute or two, said he was proud of us and then left us. He has his own family. He is happy with what he has got."

Thate is finalising the legal adoption of their son, who will grow up with a "Mama" and "Mami".


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